And a time for every purpose under Heaven

Today I was told that it was not working out and that I would have to go.

It’s a relief to me as I had been throwing up in the mornings before gong to work.

I knew last Wednesday that it was not going well and I felt like quitting then, I am not a quitter but it was just so over whelming that it seemed the only option.

However in the hope that it may have been an aberration I tried to focus on the work and not on the boss as when they were in the room. I was filled with self-consciousness and even though I tried not to, I kept making mistakes little silly ones like dropping the tools and moving things the wrong way.

My leg aches and I am in pain from it

Now I can see what the future will hold it looks grim as I am not eligible for any financial assistance from the Government.

I might try to get a job at office works.

I want to die.

I want to die

That’s how I felt when I awoke today I feel so cold and depressed the job is not going as well as I had hoped it would, there have been constant demands that I speed up.

There are several things wrong with my GTO but no time to put them right to my satisfaction, and I would feel uncomfortable complaining about it as it smacks of the bad tradesman blaming his tools.

The thought that I have left things undone in my life is the main thing that stops me from killing myself today.

The grass is not always greener on the septic tank

Amused

I have a wry smile today as I read the Joerg Haider the leader of the Right Wing Populist Party in Austria has announce that “Bush is a war criminal”

Funny that’s what the Left have been saying

But they also accuse Haider of being a closet NAZI.

It all makes me smile

out in the world

I went out tonight for the first time in months.

I met some old work colleagues and I made me realise how much I miss a job that was my whole life, you know other people have things that define their existence but for me it was my job.

My job was my life and I miss it so

You don’t spend 19 ½ years in a place without becoming attached to it
I truly am the last of the Baby Boomers those who Gen X & Y revile but I have had none of the security and stability of the early Baby Boomers.

Baby Boomer ethics in the 21st century don’t work out


Sings “It was the Jews the evil Jews who came and took my job away, I had a job I loved so much but the Jews they took it away, there be no redundancies said the Jews but the lied to me and my job is gone, I had a job a wonderful job but the Mexican Jews they took it away. I miss my job it pains me so my only job that they took from me.”

A job in my Trade

Well this is a first I have managed to get a job in my trade! I don’t know how it is going to turn out as it comes with a 3-month trial. A little shop but the owner seems a bit stressed.

A GTO 52 my machine a GTO 46, a KORD, two Heidelberg Platens and a Cylinder complete the machine line up.

I begin to wonder if this is the right thing to do?